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To you my heart, to you fellow mother, to you daddy.. a letter to you, you are not alone.

Growing up with mothers around me, with birth and kids, hearing stories, seeing them love and grow, seeing big tummies and body changes, I never ever really knew.... I never knew how much my body would change how much my heart could love and how much hormones enter every little nook of your being and change it all. I never knew I'd feel the way I have, how hard it would be. I never imagined the darkness that comes with the beautiful light of motherhood, parenthood and growing a human. I use to feel guilty for saying that, for talking about it. But we need to talk about, we need to know it's okay, that we all feel it, and that we can feel it all and still be a strong person, a good mum (/parent) ...I bled, i scarred, I ached, I collapsed, I cried, I broke down, I morphed, I changed and all the while I was fuel by love, I felt happiness and fear simultaneously, I felt guilt while I laughed and kissed my baby while I sobbed.. I knew love would always make it better, that I was okay, that I was mastering my mind and body for this human. It didn't make me feel better nor did it stop, but as time quickly flows by, I know I am evolving, and it is better. So now as I look at this is the mirror, I see my love, I see my beauty, I see my journey, I see my strength and I will not be afraid to share that. 

Then there’s the daddies...feeling it all without the physical, wishing they could help take away the pain or let the baby feed from their body, even just once to give you a break. Wishing they could make you believe how much of a good job you're doing. Feeling underestimated, scared and not being able to help. A greatly appreciated job that sometimes gets forgotten in the giant whirlwind...All the while you have stood by and supported it all. Felt the other side, and listened to every cry and sometimes just crying with me. You've made me feel loved and safe, for that I am truly truly grateful. Thank you for seeing the beauty in me even when it was dark. I love you #daddy 

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